I have weird fears. And with all this talk about the rapture supposed to be happening tomorrow, I wondered, just briefly, what if it really happens?
I grew up “in” the Church of Christ, as we said it. I was pretty serious about the Bible as a child. And I spent a lot of time thinking about judgment day, as we called it. How fucked up is that? Not only putting the fear of the end of the world into a child’s head, but calling it fucking Judgment Day. Dunn dunn dunn!!! Talk about gloom and doom.
My childhood version of Judgment Day was when God and Jesus would come back to the earth and we would all gather around waiting to hear our eternal fate. I worried constantly that I might be judged for something I had not yet had time to confess and ask forgiveness for, thus damning me to an eternity of fire and brimstone.
I spent a lot of time making deals with God and confessing trivialities. I was a strange child.
So, this morning I wondered, what if? What if my interpretation of this were to come true?
What if tomorrow, when we wake up, that bastard, that judgmental fucker has come down to rain hell and fire on all of us sinners? Wouldn’t that be a fucking trip?
The funny thing is, in theory, most Christians actually believe that we will eventually have a judgment day. So why don’t most some of them believe that it could be tomorrow? If you believe in the Bible, then, why not tomorrow?
The media can try to justify it: NPR story.
Here’s what I think.
I think the rapture is coming tomorrow. I think it has already happened. I think it will happen again.
I think that the rapture happens every time I get a whiff of a clove cigarette, or every time I eat chicken enchiladas with the meat cooked to perfection. It happened every time I got to write a hard hitting news article as a newspaper reporter.
It happens every time I spend time with good friends.
The rapture happened when I experienced the painful ecstasy of childbirth. The rapture happens when my daughter laughs with me, or when she says, “I love you mama,” totally out of the blue.
I think that this end of the world bullshit is just a cop out for people who are waiting for something better. They don’t like this world because it’s hard and it’s often tiring and painful. But they have forgotten how to look for the joy in life and let the good overwhelm the bad.
I wonder if my version of judgment day really did happen. I think if God came down and asked me if I thought I had lived a good life, I think my only real regret would be that I didn’t really appreciate the good things often enough.
So, anyway, here’s to the rapture. I’m kind of glad I hang out mostly with sinners. I’d miss you bastards if you disappeared tomorrow.