I’ve started meditating again. Finally, after six years of hemming and hawing, I’m just doing it. A couple of weeks ago I started going to a Buddhist program that has child care, so Annika gets to play on the playground and do toddler yoga while I meditate and get my spiritual cup filled. This is [...]
Categories: Austin, Detroit, Meditation, Parenting
Well folks, we’re halfway through the book, A Secure Base, written by John Bowlby, who was one of the first researchers on attachment. This next chapter is on family violence, a prevalent and far-reaching problem that stems from the most basic of needs. So far I feel like I’ve learned a lot, and much of [...]
Categories: Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory, Books, Motherhood, Parenting
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Tags: A Secure Base, Anger, Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory, Books, Family, John Bowlby, Motherhood, Parenting
I had a huge ah ha moment late last week after my last post on race, where I talked about how I have avoided calling Annika “Black.” For all my thinking on the topic of race, my education, my professional experience, my friendships, and my discussions with Toyin, I thought I had figured this one [...]
Categories: Bi-racial, Motherhood, Parenting, Race, Racial Identity, Racism
| Tags: Annika, Bi-racial, Motherhood, Parenting, Race, Racism, Stereotypes
One of my favorite non-mom blogs is Zen Habits. This week he posted about making space in your life using the design principle of creating white space. Creating white space around the important things and getting rid of clutter lets you focus on what’s important. I loved the post so much that I immediately began [...]
Categories: Attachment Parenting, Motherhood, Parenting
| Tags: Attachment Parenting, Parenting
As part of my series on attachment theory, I am summarizing, A Secure Base, by John Bowlby, a leading researcher in attachment theory, which is the basis for attachment parenting philosophy. Chapter four is Bowlby’s argument that psychology should be considered a natural science. He believed that since it had been theorized that basic human [...]
Categories: Attachment Parenting, Books, Motherhood, Parenting
| Tags: A Secure Base, Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory, Books, John Bowlby, Parenting
I did it. The other day I referred to Annika as a Black girl. I’ve purposely avoided referring to her as “the Black girl,” or “the Black baby,” when speaking to other people. I’ve said Bi-racial a few times, but never Black. Not to other people. I’ve talked to her about her skin being Brown. [...]
Categories: Bi-racial, Detroit, Motherhood, Parenting, Race, Racial Identity, Racism
| Tags: Annika, Bi-racial, Inter-racial, Multi-racial, Racism, Stereotypes
I have been making my own bath soap for a couple of years now. I started doing it because something about the process spoke to me on a cellular level. The main activity in cold process soap making is the stirring. First you mix together water and lye, then wait for it to cool down. [...]
Categories: Austin, Natural Soap, Parenting
| Tags: Annika, Motherhood
I’m going to finish up chapter three of a A Secure Base, in this post. We left off with Bowlby’s belief that no matter a child’s personality, the mother sets the basic tone of mother/child interaction. This is part of my series studying attachment theory as put forth by one of the premier theorists, in [...]
Categories: Attachment Parenting, Books, Motherhood
| Tags: A Secure Base, Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory, Books, John Bowlby, Motherhood, Parenting
I wouldn’t say that one of my main problems in life is putting too much effort into anything. For the most part, my life has consisted of me sitting around during bad times and going, “Man this sucks, but making it better would take too much effort.” And during good times, going, “Yeeah, that’s right.” [...]
Categories: Attachment Parenting, Fatherhood, Motherhood, Parenting
| Tags: A Secure Base, Annika, Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory, Books, John Bowlby, Motherhood
Chapter three of A Secure Base, by John Bowlby, started out pretty dry, but has gotten much juicier. In this chapter, I’m learning that how a mother, or primary attachment figure treats her/his child directly correlates with the child’s daily behavior. More on Chapter 3 of A Secure Base, the theory behind Attachment Parenting: We [...]
Categories: Attachment Parenting, Books, Motherhood, Parenting
| Tags: A Secure Base, Attachment Parenting, Attachment Theory, John Bowlby, Motherhood, Parenting
